Why Dating Apps Are Hard
for Non-Monogamous People
Dating apps have become a staple in modern dating culture, offering convenience and a vast pool of potential partners. However, non-monogamous individuals often find these platforms challenging to navigate. One major issue is the lack of options specifically designed for non-monogamous relationships. Most mainstream dating apps cater predominantly to monogamous users, making it difficult for non-monogamous individuals to find like-minded partners. Furthermore, other users do not always understand the terminology of non-monogamy.
One of the challenges that non-monogamous individuals often face is misunderstandings and stigma on dating platforms. Many users may not fully comprehend the dynamics of non-monogamous relationships, leading to awkward conversations or outright rejection when discussing one’s lifestyle.
This lack of understanding can create a daunting and unwelcoming atmosphere for those who identify as polyamorous, open, or in any other form of non-monogamous relationship.
Another hurdle is the limited representation of non-monogamous individuals within the app’s frameworks. Most dating profiles are built around traditional monogamous expectations, which can make it hard for users to express the complexity of their relationships.
Phrases like “I’m looking for something casual” often fall short of encapsulating the depth and nuances of non-monogamy, leaving potential matches unsure about what the individual truly wants.
For example, people may use the term polyamory while merely seeking an easy hook-up, whereas most polyamorous people are on a quest for something with depth and connection. Others might use the apps to cheat on their partners, while non-monogamous people pride themselves on being honest and seeking the consent of all involved.
This means that even if a dating app offers the options needed to navigate the platform as a non-monogamous person, there is still a lot to manage regarding expectations. So what can help in navigating these apps better, especially when you are new to the non-monogamous spectrum?
First, educate yourself on non-monogamous relationship models. Familiarize yourself with terms such as polyamory, open relationships, and swinging, as each has its own norms and expectations. Resources like books, podcasts, and online forums focused on non-monogamous lifestyles can provide valuable insights.
Next, understanding your motivations is crucial. Reflect on why you want to pursue non-monogamy. Is it to explore new connections, fulfill emotional needs, or enhance intimacy with existing partners? Clarifying your intentions will guide your journey and help you communicate effectively on your profile.
Once you have a solid understanding of your motivations and the concepts behind non-monogamy, you will be better equipped to articulate what you want on dating apps, which can help in selecting the right people.
Of course, the dynamics of apps can still be frustrating. The prevalence of ghosting and superficial connections on dating apps can be particularly upsetting for those seeking more meaningful connections. Non-monogamous individuals often desire deeper conversations and connections, which can be elusive in a swipe culture focused on quick interactions.
To counteract these challenges, many non-monogamous individuals turn to niche dating platforms designed specifically for their lifestyle, or they may seek community events such as speed dating tailored for non-monogamous people.
These events create environments where open communication can flourish, making it easier to meet partners who appreciate non-monogamy and its various forms. What are your challenges when dating as a non-monogamous person? Let us know in the comments below or on our social media channels.
Speed dating for non-monogamous people
The polyamory community increasingly asked the question: how do I meet people for dating? Dating is explicitly not allowed at many events and many dating apps do not work well if you are non-monogamous.
That is why a number of people from the community have joined forces to make this possible. We therefore have no commercial objective. The events are organized by, for and with the community.

More to Adore: Speed Dating Event for Non-Monogamous People – Safe, Diverse, and Inclusive
Are you looking for new connections within the non-monogamous community? Whether you’re looking for a relationship, a deep connection, or just want to meet like-minded people—More to Adore is the speed dating event you want to attend!

How to Create a Safe Space Within a Non-Monogamous Setting
Creating a safe space within non-monogamous relationships is crucial for ensuring that all individuals feel respected, valued, and secure in their connections. To achieve this, establishing trust is fundamental. Begin by being honest and transparent with your partners about your feelings, intentions, and boundaries. Encouraging them to do the same can foster an atmosphere where everyone feels safe sharing their thoughts.

Terminology Within Non-Monogamy
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Can Non-Monogamy Be Toxic?
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5 Do’s and 5 Don’ts When Bringing Non-Monogamy up with My Monogamous Partner
Opening up a relationship is a significant conversation that requires sensitivity and consideration. Here are five do’s and don’ts for approaching this discussion with your monogamous partner.

10 Things to Talk About Before You Open Up Your Relationship
Opening up a relationship is a significant step that requires thoughtful discussion. Here are ten important topics to cover before making this transition: